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April 11, 2017

advice for youtube content to ACTUALLY make good content

1. Drop the 30 second dubstep intro. We don't care. 

2. No 3 minute rambling monologue at the beginning of the video explaining who you are and what this video is about. Yes, we are here already because we clicked on the video title explaining what it's about. We can see your username also, no need to announce that. Stop telling me "so yeah, that's what I'm going to show you guys here today". I presumed that already given that I clicked on the f***ing video to begin with. 

3. Stop going off on tangents about unrelated s***. This video has been running for 4 minutes and you still haven't got to the point, stop making it worse. 

4. Get a decent microphone and stop breathing directly into the mic, you goddamn mouth-breather.

5. Actually plan a little how you're going to do this video before pressing record. Realising halfway through that you don't have the materials you need or that you don't have a way to easily film what you're doing because you lack a tripod or a place to sit the camera is stupid and we don't want to watch you painfully figure it out while live.

6. Stop explaining basic concepts that anyone who's already doing the task would have to know already. If this is a tutorial on better wood chopping techniques, don't spend 5 f***ing minutes giving me a pros/cons list of why using a homemade fire over central heating is a rewarding experience. 

7. "Be sure to like comment and subscribe. Check out my channel and blah blah blah" - I know you want to be youtube famous but really I just came here to learn some different egg poaching techniques, I don't need to see your 20 episode Let's Play series. 

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